Install this theme

dylanthescientist:

princetanaka:

just a small town girl. Living in a racist, insensitive, sexist, homophobic world,

(cant take the midnight train ‘cause im fuckin scared)

Anonymous
asks:
you tell crazy stories but has a woman ever tried to kill you ?

jimmbbo:

perfect-melodies-filthy-wubs:

prettyboyshyflizzy:

This one girl accused me of cheating for having female friends (which i wasnt fucking or flirting with but was just cool friends I dont wanna talk to a bunch of niggas all day i need a female perspective on things) she was screaming at me for 20 mins straight

i dont argue back cause im laid back im just like mhmmm mhmmm looking in my phone checking sports scores and on twitter … so at one point she says “was the pussy atleast good my nigga?” i was like “mmhmm that shit was nice and tight”  all of a sudden i heard silence i look up shes like

image

*this is the moment where i knew i fucked up*

just looks at me like that for like 20 seconds “im like bae im just playing.. im just playing…”  she runs to the kitchen… and starts going in the drawers “im like shawty u needa chill”   im like “im just playing”

she pulls something out all i see was the light beam reflect off it

i get a good look i see this in her hand

im in the couch like

she starts running towards me so i open the door step outside then shut the door from the outside and use all my body weight to hold onto the door knob, She used to run track in highschool so i think she gon catch me so im like nah im not even gon run and get stabbed in the spine

she pulling tryna open it lol im in a project type building on the 12th floor man I was standing there for 43 mins shorty aint have an ounce of quit in her. People walking by laughing hearing her screaming at me

some middle aged lady walked by she was like 50 she was like “mmmmhmmm she caught your ass didnt she”

im like “ma’am help my arms tired”

she was like ahaaa nope “call that bitch you was fucking for help”  and walked into her apt

then shorties mom came out the elevator i was like thank god.. she was like oh lord what u do.. i was like “nothingg ma’am she got a knife i swear i did nothing ” her mom was like “kita put the damn knife down im coming in if u stab me imma beat your ass” i feel the pressure get off the door and i make a run for it i see her try to come chase me but her mom blocks her Im sure i coulda beat usain bolt in a race the way i was running

she was really gon stab me, If her moms aint come i woulda still been standing there holding the door to this day

i’ve never re-blogged something so quick in my life. 

I fuckin love tumblr stories

smilestoinspire:

This is the greatest tweet in the history of tweets

smilestoinspire:

This is the greatest tweet in the history of tweets

bakrua:

hartorotica:

I’m just saying -

Theoretically, since there seems to be no life form on Mars right now, and we have sent robots to transmit information to us, that implies that 100% of Mars’ current population consists out of robots.

We have a planet in our universe that’s solely inhabited by robots. Mars is a robot planet.

well ur not wrong

justasimplehoe:

what are the symptoms of being fergalicious

relahvant:

alt-j:

caseyaunthony:

i dont get this picture

obviously some sloppy fuck left their orange peels on the ground and Hillary Clinton happened to be skating by and slipped on them. Not to hard to understand. She still smilin doe

hillary clinton

relahvant:

alt-j:

caseyaunthony:

i dont get this picture

obviously some sloppy fuck left their orange peels on the ground and Hillary Clinton happened to be skating by and slipped on them. Not to hard to understand. She still smilin doe

hillary clinton

spookyweedwitch:

rhyse:

i hate when people call their grandparents weird names instead of grandma and grandpa like babooshka or salami

people speak other languages you complete fuckwit

thisacidsucks:

what are you looking for

thisacidsucks:

what are you looking for